Carl R. Rogers, from his book, A Way of being, said, “I find it very satisfying when I can be close to whatever it is that is going on within me. I feel a sense of satisfaction when I dare to communicate the realness in me to another (which usually brings out the ‘sparkling feeling’ of bringing out the realness in another person).” The realness in nine beautiful Liberian women is what will be communicated on July 14, 2006 in Minnesota as part of this year Liberia Independence day celebrations.
D. Koffa at the Sinoe Convention
In one of his popular rap songs, Ludicrous said, “no doubt, for sure the best women in the world are from Africa.” Or in the word of pop legend, Michael Jackson, “Liberian girls you came and changed my world.” This is the case come Friday, July 14, 2006, when nine beautiful and talented young women in the Liberian community in Minnesota appear on stage to vie for a very prestigious crown, the Miss Liberia Crown.
Over the weeks, I’ve tried to contact organizers of the pageant to no avail, as many telephone calls were not answered or returned. However, I recently caught up with one of the contestants, beautiful, intelligent and talented Miss Dekontee Koffa who agreed to have a conversation.
BTB: Who is Dekontee Koffa?
DK: Above all I am a God loving person who treats others with respect. I am a graduate of St. Cloud State University with a Bachelor of Science degree in psychology. I presently work at the Center for Sexual Assault Victims with direct one on one counseling responsibility for sexually abused women. I am a community leader and a self starter.
BTB: Where were you born?
DK: I was born on Sunday morning, May 4, 1980 in Sinoe County, Liberia. I was raised in Monrovia, Liberia. My father is Joe Koffa; Mother, Beatrice J Wesseh. Due to the civil war in Liberia, my family fled to Sierra Leone and later moved to the U.S. in 1990.
BTB: What prompted you to contest for the Miss Liberia Crown?
DK: I decided to contest this time because in the past I’ve been in the audience and seen the performances of some of the contestants. While the program is a great means of bringing the young and the old together, I have always wished there were more contestants who were competitive. I have always wished there was real competition but there have been just one or two girls who will stick out. Being a person who will wish for something and do something about it to make a difference, I decided to contest this time. I believe that when you want something done right, you sometimes have to take the first step to do it yourself.
BTB: Will you say the contestants are well prepared this time?
DK: Definitely, we’ve been meeting for two hours a day for the past weeks. There are some girls in the pageant this year who are serious competitors and for me I do not like things easy. If I am going to win something, I want to feel that I’ve work hard for it. I have to give credit to the planning committee this year, Jallah, Theo, Henrietta, and others for doing such a fine job. As contestants, we are well-informed about activities and expectations. We’ve worked together to build each other’s confidence.
BTB: How long exactly have this preparation being going on?
DK: I have been in this for a month now.
BTB: If you win, what do you hope to achieve beyond the crown?
DK: I am the founder of an organization in St. Cloud called Today’s Women. It is a mentoring organization that I started when I was a sophomore student in college. I started this organization because I was going through academic difficulties. I believed most of our young women go through situations like that. Though I pulled myself out of it, it is easy for young women who are going through situations like that to drop out of school because they may not have the support system. They therefore look at their situation as hopeless. For me I pulled out because I had a very strong support system from my family and other resources on campus. I decided to do something more structured to help other students in similar situations who may not have the support. Another motivating aspect that led to the formation of this organization is a female vice principle of one of the local junior high schools came to the university one day asking for volunteers to become mentors to some of the girls in her school who were constantly in trouble. Two other girls and I volunteered. Ever since, the program has been very successful. From there on I started it on the university campus. The program has won many awards from the city and state. This is the kind of program I want to bring to my community. I have the blue print. As founder, I stay work through the university, I stay write most of the grants and designed programs to keep the program strong and functional.
BTB: How do you plan to bring such program to a community in which most of the young women are traumatized from years of civil war?
DK: I started out small and I planned to start out small in the community. It will take hard work and dedication. I am aware of some of the problems facing the young women in our community. I am not promising a success overnight but I plan on getting some of our community leaders and parents involved. In St. Cloud, we directly work with the parents and I hope to do the same in the community. This is something I am going to start regardless of the result of the pageant. I just hope with the title Miss Liberia attached to the project, it might attract more people but it is going to happen regardless.
BTB: If you win the pageant on Friday, how prepare are you for the grand final in Philly?
DK: I am very prepared. I come from a home with two very strong parents who have always taught me be to be prepared. I have come to realized in my life that my biggest competitor is myself. I do not mostly compete with other people, but I always try to out do myself. If I win in Minnesota I will try hard to out do what I did here to win. I am not worried about the rest of the contestants there; I am worried about doing the best to win.
BTB: Is there a particular girl in the competition this year who you think can win over you?
DK: I look at all of them as possible winners. I understand that there are external and internal forces that could dictate the result. The judges, the crowd, etc. I have self confidence, but any of the girls could win.
BTB: What will you say is your biggest fear in the competition?
DK: My biggest fear is the swim suit part of the night. I am a conservative person, yes! I go to the beach, I swim but exposing myself on stage knowing that I am being judged by my body might be a little different for me. However, I understand and my supporters understand that it is for a good cause.
BTB: Who really encouraged you to become a contestant?
DK: A friend, Sweetie who is also a graduate of St. Cloud State University and a member of the organizing committee of the pageant. Beside there is a little bit of cash that may help me with my graduate program.
BTB: Do you have brothers and sisters and how supportive are they of your decision?
DK: I have six sisters and three brothers and as I said earlier, our family is very supportive of each other.
BTB: What do you do in your spare time?
DK: I work out most of the time, but the mentoring program takes up most of my time. I am active in the Liberian community. During the last presidential debate I served as one of the moderators. I am always doing something to help people around me.
BTB: You were a moderator at the debate, your friend who is a member of the organizing team of the pageant encouraged you to contest, and you are entering graduate school. Do you sense any special treatment towards you in the competition?
DK: If that is the case someone needs to let me know. Most of the girls do not even know me and I didn’t know them until now. I believed most of them were not at the debate. Most of the people who know me in the community are the intellectuals. I do not get any special treatment. Anyone can win this competition.
BTB: Since you made the decision to contest, has there been any time when you wish you could quit?
DK: Yes! Last week when I didn’t have the required attire and my cousin in Philly kept asking me what was I doing? But now I am fine and ready because I have all my attires.
BTB: Win or loose, what will you like to tell the young women in the community?
DK: Dream big and take actions to make your dream a reality. Most often it is easy for us to defeat ourselves. For example, I have sat in the audience for years and said to myself no, that is not for me, I rather stay in the background to support others. This is why the pageant is more challenging for me. I want to tell the young women in the community to set goals and work towards achieving those goals. I am speaking of realistic goals. Secondly, I will tell them to listen to the elders because they’ve been to where we are. Some say the elders are from the old school but they need to understand that it is that old school that made them experienced people. The elders have been there and done that.
BTB: When the pageant is over and the graduate school is over, what next for you?
DK: I hope by that time I will be home in Liberia and can use my acquired knowledge to help my people. I know that in our normal collective society back home, it is hard for psychologists to work successfully but I think there is a need for my profession in the post war society in Liberia. I hope I can be helpful in such direction. I intend to do a case study on Liberia during my graduate program focusing on post traumatic disorder.
BTB: Who is your role model?
DK: My mother, because she is such a strong woman. She has worked assiduously to get us to this point in our lives. She is such a determined woman. She taught us to be strong and have self confidence. I also admire Oprah Winfrey; I admire her commitment and willingness to give back to the community. She understands where she comes from and she is determined in setting goals and achieving them.
BTB: What last word do you have for the rest of the contestants and your supporters?
DK: To the contestants, I say be yourself. I say to my supporters and the community that it is important for you to turn out on Friday to show your support. This program is a great way of bringing all of us together. Come and see beautiful Liberian women making you proud. Thank God and thank you all for the prayers and support.
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